New Life, New Chapter!

I've plunged back into living life again. My latest mammogram showed no signs of cancer in my breast. I wondered what I was suppose to do with the news. Does that mean I can live?  Days leading to the test, I felt incredible amount of anxiety and fear. It felt like I was waiting for a death sentence. I actually felt physical pain thinking about what they might find. I was sick and tired of living in such fear. Sick and tired, I tell ya!

Before I went in, I prayed "Lord, if this test comes back negative, I will live with courage! I will not look back. I am going forward and going to do all the things you have put on my heart. Help me". I was happy and relieved to get the good news. My doctors and nurses celebrated with me. I'm in remission. No one can tell if and when but I will take clearance for today. My doctor even removed the port they placed in my chest. They sedated me but I found myself fighting not to fall asleep. I think I was afraid I might never wake up again. In my sedated stage, I heard some people praying aloud in Korean. There was no way anyone would pray that loud in the pre-surgical room but I heard them. I slurred my words to tell my husband that someone is praying in Korean and he heard it as "pray for me in Korean". Well, he prayed for me in Korean. I came out fine.

So, I think that's my cue to say, I am going forward, living and doing all the things God has put on my heart. No more excuses! Go! Launch!

Last weekend I went to speak at a youth conference. I was to do a track on self-image. I thought it was appropriate and humorous that I was assigned to speak on self-image (esteem). I was tempted to show to the youth a photo of me when I had lost all my hair but I couldn't find one. They probably don't want to see it anyway. I hope the youth who attended my session were encouraged as I was. Actually, it was a dream come true. A few years ago, when I first heard about this particular youth conference, I thought to myself that one day I will go and speak to the youth. It was almost comical that I thought about it in such detail. I was encouraged that the teens were so generous in telling me I was good and they learned a lot from me. Some told me they even liked my voice. :) But the enemy would not let me enjoy the moment. I was physically  and emotionally attacked. I felt pain in my foot and couldn't even stand-up. My heart sank because I felt that I was not delivering in an effective way. I was so discouraged and thought I should not have even come. I was not good enough, I was not healthy enough...etc. I almost lost focus on why I was there at the first place...to serve. It took me a while to first, realize it was an attack and second, to ask for prayer and to shake it off. I had to proclaim out loud that I am a child of God and I am good enough because Jesus said I am loved!

I am also preparing to open up an office in my town. I am working on certification so that I can serve more people in the community. It will be life coaching, counseling, and educating teen, women and families on relationship, communication, marriage, leadership...etc. It will be more like a community center for families than a therapy office.  The name is going to be "Care2gether Family Center".  I have network of ministries whom I will continue to work with and hope to grow together. I will also be working on many more projects while raising my own family! I need a lot of prayer and support. Please continue to pray for me and Care2gether Family Center.  I send my utmost sincere thanks to all of you who have prayed for me and showed your love for me. Thank you! Thank you!